Susan Lee's Musings

No Mere ‘Coinkydink’

Albert Einstein once said, “Coincidence is God’s way of remaining anonymous.”  As much as my dad respected Einstein, he would insist that one slight alteration be made, and that it be designated a ‘coinkydink’, as that was the way he coined the term.  After much reading, I am convinced that Einstein believed, as I do, that there is no such thing as a ‘coinkydink’, which means that God must be quite busy.  At least I’m confident, that with regard to one particular subject, I could come up with a good enough argument to make the case. 

I have been thinking about my life and my mom, Roberta.  After much consideration, I have deduced that she could not have been more perfectly designed to nurture me.  Even before I was born, she became a registered nurse, undoubtedly because of her innate aspiration to help hurting people, but when eventually faced with her own sickly infant daughter, registering a temperature of 107 degrees and convulsing, she was already trained and knew what to do instead of panicking.  For every subsequent medical situation, (frequent acute and chronic occurrences), her brain was filled with the answers to my needs, and it was no mere ‘coinkydink’.

My mother has two heartfelt qualities that have indelibly shaped me into the person that I am.  In fact, I could not be satisfied in my life, if events had turned out differently.  First, my mom is a passionate lover of music, which opened doors to my ears and heart.  In some ways, the love of music activated my life.  Second, my mother is a stubborn adherent to a ‘mutually-agreed-to’ promise.  What I mean is that I was a whimsical five year old, taking ballet lessons from a strict old-fashioned instructor.  I hated it.  After much whining, my mom said that I could quit ballet for piano lessons, but later there would be NO quitting piano.  I understood exactly what she meant: NO quitting-EVER.  I agreed.  What can I say?  The love of music and the stubborn insistence to finish what you’ve started are two of the things that have kept me alive, and it was no mere ‘coinkydink’. 

When I was a 3^rd grader at Power’s Elementary School, my mother had perceptive eyes, those she needed to see beyond what seemed obvious.  The ‘gifted’ programs were just beginning in our town and I was tested and selected to be bussed to a school across town by myself.  My mom saw that isolating and moving me would be detrimental, and that the benefits of a new program were not worth my separation from an environment where I was thriving.  In the end, I somehow got both, because a teacher at Power’s worked with the new curriculum and me.  How many times those keen eyes of mom’s have continued giving me aid, seeing through and around to the genuine, and it was no mere ‘coinkydink’.

I am amazed at the design of my mother’s ears, and her ability to discern what has not been said.  I must admit, that when I was young, I was wimpy when it came time to saying ‘no’ to certain people.  If I was at a friend’s house, they asked me to spend the night and I didn’t want to, I would call my mom and say, “Hey mom, can I spend the night at Sally’s house?”  Because of her insightful ears, she would respond, “You don’t want to stay there, do you?  Then tell Sally that I said ‘No’.”  That was the first occasion that I realized the extent of her auditory acuity, but certainly not the last.  She hears between the lines of every phone conversation into my state of mind and the essence of my feelings, whether I can voice them or not.  She helps me now from 3,000 miles away, in the state of Maine, even when I feel wimpy, as much as she ever did, and it was no mere ‘coinkydink’.

Being so far away now, you would think that I was beyond the reach of my mother’s comforting touch.  You would be mistaken, for long ago, she invented something called a ‘round hug’. This is the kind of unique hug that fully surrounds you, supports you, uplifts you, enfolds you, and invigorates you.   When I was young, failed the bicycle safety test at school and was too embarrassed to say so at first, her hug gave me courage to admit the truth, face the failure, and try again.  When the neighborhood girls were being mean, just for the sake of being mean, that hug helped me to not cry myself to sleep and to hold my head high on the next day of school.  When my teenage girlfriend told me she would kill herself, that hug and my mom’s wisdom took charge of my friend and me.  When doctors thought my two-year-old daughter might have leukemia, that hug calmed me.  Today, that ‘round hug’ has miraculous properties that compel it to cross the American countryside when I am yearning for it, and it gently embraces my soul, just as surely as it did when I was a child in my mother’s household.  Her ‘round hugs’ fit me completely, and that was no mere ‘coinkydink’.

There are many more ways my mother is perfection, like the way she cooks with skill and love, so that even now, I can imagine favorite foods from my childhood and sense a comforting feeling, while their smell practically wafts past my nose.  I could not neglect to mention her boundless energy for fun, that always kept things hopping at our house, and how she taught me to laugh, if at all possible, because that is always the better course. I thank God for my mom, I so love her, and that is no mere ‘coinkydink’.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom, and RH2U!